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So I’ve started my first chosen novel of my hundred. I am three fifths of the way through it, and I am an emotional wreck. I am reading “Silver Metal Lover” by Tanith Lee. I was drawn to this novel because it is a book about robots who are human and people who aren’t anything resembling human. I love stories like these, because despite the cogs and gears and flashy futuristic settings, they are intellectually about being human and the ask the big questions about what it means to be. But that is just the point, I am drawn to these types of stories on a very cerebral level. It is why I liked “The Matrix” and as horribly geeky as it sounds, the Borg on Star Trek. These machines and conditions made mind puzzles for my brain to philosophically contemplate, and then forget about as soon as the next Drizzt novel or Mercedes Lackey book came out.
Unfortunately, “Silver Metal Lover” is, well, a love story, and is a far shot from cerebral. I have been sucked into the romance and I am now reminded of how I felt when I was in ninth grade chasing hopelessly after Ryan. That sucked majorly. But I think that is a mark of how skillful a writer Lee is. She makes me remember what the first awful bloom of love does to you, makes you think, how irrational you become. I am now, thanks to this novel, am emotional wreck and am crying because my cat kissed my nose. This also pisses me off and makes me tired. I am going to bed now, so unfortunately my plan for finishing the book tonight is shot. But I had to write this to get the clenching feelings out of my guts, and at the same time I am really happy to be reminded about how much I love that kid I like and how that first dizzying, crushing, ambushing feeling of first “love” turns into the quieter, calmer, deeper, more mature. I hate being in two emotional places at once, this annoys me, for now I feel....soupy. I know, what a way to describe it. Anyways, after I sleep (it probably doesn’t help that I am now exactly at me 24th hour of being awake), I will try to finish up and write a better analysis of the first novel in my project. Arghhh, soupy. I haven’t been this soggy since “A.I.” Yes, I balled during that damn movie too.
Unfortunately, “Silver Metal Lover” is, well, a love story, and is a far shot from cerebral. I have been sucked into the romance and I am now reminded of how I felt when I was in ninth grade chasing hopelessly after Ryan. That sucked majorly. But I think that is a mark of how skillful a writer Lee is. She makes me remember what the first awful bloom of love does to you, makes you think, how irrational you become. I am now, thanks to this novel, am emotional wreck and am crying because my cat kissed my nose. This also pisses me off and makes me tired. I am going to bed now, so unfortunately my plan for finishing the book tonight is shot. But I had to write this to get the clenching feelings out of my guts, and at the same time I am really happy to be reminded about how much I love that kid I like and how that first dizzying, crushing, ambushing feeling of first “love” turns into the quieter, calmer, deeper, more mature. I hate being in two emotional places at once, this annoys me, for now I feel....soupy. I know, what a way to describe it. Anyways, after I sleep (it probably doesn’t help that I am now exactly at me 24th hour of being awake), I will try to finish up and write a better analysis of the first novel in my project. Arghhh, soupy. I haven’t been this soggy since “A.I.” Yes, I balled during that damn movie too.
