(no subject)

[darkelf105]

New Cere beginning. Does it flow a bit better? I know there isn't much, I will be adding more throughout the day...

Toby Marcos twisted frantically in the sunlight that poured over his grandfather’s farm. It was to no avail; no matter which way he squirmed or jumped or turned, his shadow was still missing. It made no sense. People did not just lose their shadows. Toby gulped back panic and stood very still in the afternoon sun. He furrowed his brow and tugged at the metal studs in his ears.

 

            “This has to be a dream.” His voice quavered and cracked in adolescent uncertainty. The warble in his throat betrayed what he knew to be true. It wasn’t really a dream and his shadow was not there.

 

            “You’re in some trouble, kiddo.”  Toby whirled around, his heart shuddering wildly in his throat, mouth dry. Someone else had seen. But who? His grandfather had gone to town early this morning and was not due back till sunset, and besides, no one lived on the farm but his grandfather and himself. The voice had been female.

 

He peered into the shadows of the dilapidated barn. His grandfather’s cat Fang, was sitting daintily in the shade of the barn door. Other than the cat, who yawned in apparent boredom and began grooming herself with a neat, pink tongue, there was no one. Toby gulped in air and began to tentatively make his way towards the barn. Whoever she was, she had to be in there, hiding with his secret.

 

Fang stopped grooming herself for a moment and flicked a glance his way. Her eyes sparked greenly as she said, “You know Tobias, there is an ant making its merry way into you hat. You may want to pick it up.” He stopped and stared. There was no possible way that the cat was talking to him. No way.

 

“There are now two ants. It might just be an ant parade. Or maybe the gel you use to accomplish that, ah, hairdo, is super good to eat. Perhaps you should try a different brand? One that doesn’t attract insects.” She inspected a small, clawed paw and then looked back at him.

 

“Well, cat got your tongue? Or perhaps your are utterly at a loss for words because your shadow is gone? Or maybe you really are as stupid as you look?”

Comments

pretty good

[rokk-lobster.livejournal.com]

The no shadow thing is a nice touch, but I hope that you kept the weird critters that eventually chase him. The last line seemed a bit to drawn out. Keep the cats verbal jabbs short.

Re: pretty good

[(Anonymous)]

Yes, the critters will be back. They were coolness. So will the whole seen with the tree. I am just reworking some of the aspects of Cere. s'all. Also, yeah. I am having a hard time getting back into Fang's brain. I just kept hearing Stewie in my head.....No more Family Guy before I write.

Re: pretty good

[darkelf105.livejournal.com]

Logging in would be good. Also, I meant scene not seen.

[rayechu.livejournal.com]

Didn't get to look at this before school, going to try and print and read.